The fires in California are clearly wearing people’s patience thin, understandably. I have family and friends there. Over on Facebook, I just got blocked by a friend, who I’ve never met in person, who lives near one of these fires. This quickly happened after a mild disagreement arose between us about something quite minor. I expressed a short, mixed reaction on his page about a film he happens to like.
This now-former “friend” is a published author and man with whom I share a lot of sensibilities. I appreciate much of his perspective/worldview.
The loss is a small one and I suppose it can be argued it’s their loss more than mine. But, briefly, it admittedly hurts. (And I am all-too-familiar with over-reactivity.)
**Note to self: Breathe. We live in tense, often chaotic times. Remember to think and speak from compassion. Ultimately, most of us, if not all, are in this together.
4 thoughts on “A Small Loss”
I am so sorry for your “small” loss. Any loss that hurts isn’t really all that small, is it? I find it so odd that people can be over-reactive about disagreements on such things as books or film etc. My longtime mentor from college stopped speaking to me (forever) after I unexpectedly was seated behind her at Faneuil Hall around a decade ago. We were there to see a raging debate about authorship of Shakespeare’s plays. She is an avid Shakespearean, and I at the time allowed to her that I was tending toward believing the opposing side that argued Edward de Vere wrote them. That was the end of that relationship.
Perhaps he will rethink things when the emotionality of the fires has been quenched.
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Thank you, Jazz. And, wow! What a display of some part/ego on this mentor’s behalf, rather than having a more Self-aware openness to hearing a different perspective from you about something (Shakespeare and his works). So sad. Sorry to hear you went through this. It is indeed odd when people get so worked up over books, movies, etc., as if what you feel and think about such creations somehow reflects how you personally view the other person with whom you are dialoguing.
Perhaps this “friend” will re-think things, as you say, but my gut tells me he won’t. I have been tossed aside into his dustbin of irrelevance. Ah, well.
“…his dustbin of irrelevance.” Oh, my. Poignant metaphor that delivered a belly punch along with compassion for you. On thinking, I guess we all have one of these sorts of dustbins. Mine contains things such as spectator sports and tabloid magazines, but I hadn’t considered that people might be relegated to this space. Hmmm. Your metaphor has spurred reflection on whether I have tossed anyone into my bin. I don’t want to be someone like that!
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Thank you for your supportive words. My own mental dustbin holds those same things as yours, spectator sports and tabloid magazines, for sure, among other stuff. I’d like to think that it doesn’t hold actual people for me either, though the heinous behaviors of some give me thought about dumping them there. However, even poorly-behaved people are reminders to me of how *not* to be, which is a relevant lesson of sorts. Hmmm, indeed.